


Reeling Through the Midnight Streets (I Want 'Em Back)

by ChiwiTheKiwi



Category: Iron Man (Movies), Marvel Cinematic Universe, Spider-Man (Tom Holland Movies)
Genre: Don't copy to another site, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Gen, Light Angst, Not Beta Read, Peter Parker Needs a Break, Peter Parker Needs a Hug, Peter is once again the victim of me projecting my problems onto my comfort characters, Rated Teen because of one use of a curse word, Set in an ambiguous time after Homecoming and likely ignoring Infinity War in the process, Stargazing, Sunsets, Tony Stark Acting as Peter Parker's Parental Figure, Tony Stark Feels, Tony Stark Has A Heart
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-08-29
Updated: 2020-08-29
Packaged: 2021-03-06 22:54:23
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,886
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26166709
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ChiwiTheKiwi/pseuds/ChiwiTheKiwi
Summary: Peter has lost a good deal of his prime years as a teenager to grief and obligation. There's only one person left he can think to turn to.
Relationships: Peter Parker & Tony Stark
Comments: 7
Kudos: 54





	Reeling Through the Midnight Streets (I Want 'Em Back)

**Author's Note:**

  * Inspired by [older than i am](https://archiveofourown.org/works/25273696) by [ironarana](https://archiveofourown.org/users/ironarana/pseuds/ironarana). 



> First and foremost, this one-shot is **inspired by ironarana's fic titled "older than i am"**. I read their fic and it got me thinking and [waves hands] this is how I'm dealing with my own thoughts, a month late but better late than never. Go read it!!! It tugged my heart strings
> 
> The title is inspired by Lorde's song Ribs, which has always been a song I've associated with nostalgia and I thought was best fitting for the tone and contents of this fic
> 
> Be warned I wrote this on two separate days a whole month apart and so I honestly have no clue what the quality of this will look like even though I looked through it twice. I don't consider myself a fantastic writer but I enjoy doing it anyway, so now I'm making you all face my hubris head on. Anyway, I hope y'all enjoy!!
> 
>  **EDIT:** I posted this work just before the announcement came out. To everyone who is hurting after Chadwick Boseman's death, I do ask that you take care of yourselves, and try and do the things that make you happy. For whoever may need to hear it, even if you did not know him personally, it is understandable to be broken up by the news, and it is fine to grieve. Please stay safe. [Take the time to look at these resources if you're needing support or would like to give it. ](https://goob789.tumblr.com/post/627754504043003904/goob789-heres-a-twitter-thread-of-charities)
> 
> Also, I want to make it very clear that I am highly anti-Starker. I do not and have never supported the pairing. Anyone that does I at least ask to not directly interact with me. It makes me downright uncomfortable, and all my works will ever be revolving around Tony and Peter will be to explore the father-son dynamic that exists between them. If that doesn't align with your preferences, I ask that you don't read. Thanks.

Peter glances back up at Tony from across the lab, his hands stilling from fiddling with a small piece of metal plating. The man has his attention focused on the blueprints on the table in front of him, a pencil spinning between his fingers while his eyes dart across the papers. He tears his eyes away, looking down at his hands again, ignoring the bagel Tony had brought down for him that sits uneaten beside him on the table. 

His head feels heavy with exhaustion as he closes his eyes hard for a few seconds before reopening them to squint down at the exposed mechanisms of his webshooter. He hadn’t been able to sleep the previous night, kept up into the early hours of the morning before sleeping for just a few hours, only to inevitably have to get up again so that he wouldn’t be late for school. 

Lately his own mind has been at odds with him, spending any time he isn’t preoccupied as an opportunity for reflection over the last few years of his life. Thinking leads to a spiraling rabbit hole, one that leaves his stomach feeling sick with melancholy, and so his efforts had gone entirely into distracting himself in any way he could, hoping to find levity rather than have to acknowledge the intrusive nature of the thoughts any more than he already had. Now, however, he’s come to realise that they have been yet to let up; the cork to plug the leak of unwanted introspection proving entirely ineffective. 

It’s why he’d come to this bi-weekly lab session hoping that finally talking about it could offer some peace of mind. Peter has never liked bearing his heart to May, rather wishing to work through his emotions on his own than share the burden and make her worry any more than she already has to. Ever since she'd found out he was Spider-Man, he’s seen the subtle way she’s become just a bit more cautious and occasionally protective of him. He sees the concern any time it gets brought up, and it’s enough to urge him to avoid sharing too much out of the irrational fear that he might cause her to break. Ned and MJ were also out of the question, as while he knows that they would be more than willing to listen to what he has to say, he’s fairly certain that they wouldn’t be able to quite understand the situation.

Sometimes Peter is still unsure where he sits with Tony. Their relationship sometimes perplexes even him, but he’s at least sure that it isn’t what it started out as. It’s grown and molded itself in a way that Peter can’t always fully understand, constantly changing to suit the given situation or atmosphere of the room. Sometimes he’ll be completely blindsided after a moment passes between the two of them that feels eerily similar to what he used to share with Ben. That sense of familiarity is more often a comfort than not. While he isn’t fully aware of all that has happened in Tony’s life, the offhanded comments he’s made in the time that Peter has known him personally are enough for him to form a vague picture of what his youth may have looked like. It’s why he’s elected to speak to Tony about it to begin with; he trusts that he just might understand what he’s dealing with. 

It doesn’t mean it makes this any easier to talk about. 

Looking up again, he freezes when he realises that this time the man in question is staring back, pencil now discarded. He quickly ducks his head and averts his gaze, but he knows that he’s been spotted. 

“Alright kid, what’s up?” Peter raises his eyes enough to see the curious look he’s sporting before instead staring somewhere over the man’s shoulder, finding maintaining eye contact too difficult. “You’ve been here for all of thirty minutes and haven’t even spoken once since sitting down. Plus you came in here looking like an extra from one of those zombie TV shows and are yet to touch your bagel. That’s not even to  _ mention  _ how you’ve been staring at me like I’m going to come over there and start tearing your head off at any moment.”

Peter closes his eyes and stares down at the table as he rubs nervously at the back of his neck, breathing shallowly around the gravel that weighs heavy in his lungs. 

“Can we… talk, or something?”

When there’s no immediate answer, Peter looks up to gauge Tony’s reaction, only to see the man staring at him blankly. He leans back in his seat, blinking once before tilting his head slightly. 

“I suppose we can ‘talk, or something’. Though, if this is about the Baby Gate Protocol, I’ll have you know it is purely for my own peace of mind.”

“No, that’s not…” Peter’s words drop off as he processes what the man said. “Wait, the what— Okay, no, we’ll talk about whatever that is later. I wanted to ask about something else.” He turns his eyes to the tabletop, starting to mull over how to open the discussion.

Tony must have read the more somber tone to his voice then, as Peter listens when he silently stands from his end of the lab and walks towards him. He grabs a chair from nearby and pulls it up to his side, settling into it heavily. 

“Ask away, Pete.”

He can feel the man’s eyes on him, but for some reason he just can’t push himself to meet them. Instead, he merely trails his eyes on the thin scratches that have been worn into the surface of the table over the years of use. A few seconds tick by before he finally releases the breath he had been holding, hesitant words flowing with it.

“When you were younger… did you ever feel like time had been stolen from you?”

Tony remains silent for a moment as the edges of the empty pit in Peter’s stomach erode, widening the gap. The exhaustion that plagues him feels like a vice. 

“You’re gonna need to elaborate a bit on what you mean, kid.”

At that, his mouth moves unbidden, a surprise even to himself. 

“I just... When my uncle died, my aunt became a ghost in my life for a little while. We were both grieving, and then we started getting notices from the landlord that the bills weren’t going out, and then the groceries weren’t being bought, and then I realised while I thought I was lost at sea, May was already  _ drowning _ . I was hurt, but in comparison, she was… she was practically dying.” He successfully manages to blink back the mistiness that threatens to surface at the corners of his eyes, releasing a short breath before continuing. “She usually just made sure I was okay once a day before either going to work or disappearing into her room for the rest of it. It made me realise that for once I had to step up and do something, if only to lighten the load for her slightly. And I did — I learned how to pay the rent, I started making the trips for groceries on my way back from school, and I started learning how to cook. I wasn’t  _ great _ but it was edible, and eventually it got us through until May finally came back up for air. It worked for me in a way as well, it meant I was always so busy that I never really had a moment to process the loss, at least not until some of the responsibility got taken off me again. Some things stayed the same after she saw how capable I was though. Then right after all of that, I became Spider-Man and…”

Tony remains deathly silent beside him, allowing him time to get his thoughts together. Peter is surprised at how clearly his voice still comes, untouched by any hint of emotion. 

“I started going out there and fighting people that wouldn’t have been opposed to start killing if it meant they could continue stepping on others for the sake of their own future. There are people that look at me and see someone that they think should be held on a pedestal and it’s not at all the position that I had been  _ expecting  _ to take up, but it was what was handed to me anyway.” He looks to the webshooter that has since been discarded on the side of the table, the panel to hide the internal components still removed from the device. 

“It feels kind of ironic now, since you urged me to drop the life of heroism to be a normal teenager back when Toomes was out there but… I’m starting to realise that I don't think I could have done it anyway, because it feels like I don’t know what it’s _like_ to be a teenager anymore. People would expect me to be sneaking out for selfish reasons, getting into trouble under normal circumstances— I don’t even _know_ what teenagers do at this point. Other people my age go to bed, get up, go to school, go home, and then get ready for some big party or something, and meanwhile I go to bed, get up, go to school, buy that week’s groceries, and then face off against violent and angry people all night before the routine starts itself over again.” He shakes his head minutely, cutting himself off as he forces himself to slow his breathing.

“I’m practically throwing myself a pity party here, but it just feels like I was forced to grow up far sooner than everyone else. I was suddenly taking on all this responsibility — whether anyone asked me to or not — and I had to get things right or the mistakes were so monumental that they could bring everything down around me.” He briefly thinks back to his time working against the Vulture, causing him to run a hand through his hair in an attempt to distract himself from the edge of panic that never fails to arise at the memory of the man staring down at him. “That’s what being a teenager is supposed to be about; it’s a time to make mistakes and learn how the world works but it’s also a time to just…  _ be _ . It’s a time to exist and feel and…” His words taper off, as do the dying sparks of what remains of his energy. He closes his eyes and breathes in the smells around him, grounding himself. 

_ Oil, his web fluid, the bagel still sitting uneaten on the table, the persistent smell of a sterilising agent that they had used to clean one of the tables a week ago… _

“I only have my teenage years once, but I suppose it feels like I’ve never had the opportunity to truly live them out. Until recently I hadn’t realised just how much I’ve been held back.”

He finally falls completely silent, trying to sweep away the regret and guilt that unfurls at having dropped so much on the man all at once. Tony is silent and still beside him, the only indication that he’s still there being the even, quiet breaths Peter can’t help but fixate on and try to mimic. He doesn’t know what kind of reaction to expect after an outburst like that, but he definitely wasn’t anticipating for a hand to land heavily on his shoulder, instantly drawing his attention away from the table.

Tony’s looking off across the room, deep in thought, until he blinks a few times and sighs through his nose before locking his gaze with Peter’s. 

“Yeah, Pete, I definitely had time stolen from me when I was your age.” A slight weight falls away from his chest with the admittance, but he doesn’t let it show as he listens raptly. “I was constantly trying to get myself on the same level as my father growing up. He wasn’t one to be easily impressed, and I put in far more effort than he ever deserved of me just to draw out the smallest, most often backhanded compliments that he could offer. If I wasn’t studying then I was trying to innovate, and by the time I was getting shipped off to college, you could count up any social situations I inserted myself into willingly on a single hand. It wasn’t long after I met Rhodey at MIT that I realised I was spending so much time trying to be the mirror image of my father that I let all my teenage years pass me by without a backwards glance.” Tony grimaces then, letting his hand finally fall from Peter’s shoulder to rest on the tabletop. “Of course, that’s when all the bad habits started in my attempts to make up for it, and it took me a while to be dragged back out of that life, but at least there were some bright spots.” He pins Peter with a slightly exaggerated glare. “You’re never allowed to do what I did, just so you know.”

Peter sees through to the playful nature behind the words, bringing up his hands in mock surrender with a grin.

“Hey, I said nothing about any of that stuff, you were the one to bring it up.” 

“Still. No spiders are allowed access to overwhelming amounts of any kind of substance, and if it happens, you’re grounded for life. That wouldn’t even be a result of my interference, that’s just the kind of punishment May would be more than happy to serve you.” He takes on a pensive look. “Well, that and her probably throwing a brick or five at you, and maybe one at me too for not ‘noticing the signs’ or something like that.” 

“I think watching her throw a brick at you would be the highlight of my year.”

Tony stares at him with a betrayed look before a wide smile breaks across his face and he raises a hand to settle in Peter’s hair, which he proceeds to ruffle, much to the boy’s dismay. 

“When did you earn yourself some snark, huh? I’ve been having to actively try to keep up with you lately, Parker.”

Peter shrugs as he bats away his hand, chest feeling just the slightest bit lighter than it had a minute ago — a side effect of the familiar banter. Despite the man not being all too willing to have these kinds of discussions, he always seemed capable of inserting brief moments of humor into conversation to alleviate any existing tension with ease. Perhaps it shows in some instances where the topic would be better off without, but the skill did tend to have its positive applications. 

“Is it really that surprising considering I’m hanging around you three days a week? Really, Mr. Stark, I would have expected you to know better by now.”

Tony blinks down at him, letting out an exasperated breath. “Okay, I can see you’re gonna keep going if I don’t kick you off your high horse now, so put it into park while you still have the chance.”

At this, Peter mimes zipping his mouth closed before throwing away the key, earning him a nod of approval from the man before they’re both facing forward again. The act of maintaining eye contact through the discussion that would ensue would likely only be more daunting than either of them would care to admit. 

“Now, I don’t know what you would want out of your teenage years, but let me tell you now that your life  _ doesn’t _ end once you graduate. Pete, you are the most responsible kid I know, but no one will blame you for doing some dumb things sometimes.” He tries not to outwardly flinch as his mind dredges up the memory of the Staten Island ferry incident and the consequent fallout between them. Out of the corner of his eye, he can see his mentor’s expression darken slightly, and he can only wonder if he’s thinking of the same thing. “That goes especially when you’re trying to do what’s right, by the way. Hell, I’m twice your senior and I’m  _ still  _ knowingly doing dumb things; Pepper would likely argue that I’m doing enough dumb things to warrant getting a glass jar to throw money in when I do something of good judgement for once.” 

This garners a snort out of Peter, and he can see Tony glance at him with a smirk. 

“As for the present — and please hear me out on this — if you ever wanted to really be able to really experience your life for some time, Spider-Man can always take a load off for a while—” Peter whips his head around to face him, only for a hand to cut him off before he can even begin. “I said hear me out; I’m not done.” The boy closes his mouth, clamping down on the panic that had begun to stir at the insinuation. “I know what you were going to say, and kid,  _ if  _ you wanted — emphasis on the hypothetical here — you could bench Spider-Man and instead I could patrol Queens in your place. Not forever, obviously. I know nothing could keep you away if it really tried, but I would be willing to protect your neighbourhood while you take some time to enjoy being young right now.”

Peter finds himself struggling to blink back tears that rush to well up freely at his offer. He’s always known the man cares about him, otherwise he wouldn’t have prompted the conversation as it is, but to hear him propose his own service to lighten his burden in such a direct way is far beyond anything he may have expected prior to arriving upstate. As for what he thinks of said offer…

“You don’t have to do anything so soon if you don’t want to, just know that the offer is always there, should you ever want to take it.”

Peter nods, staring bewilderedly down at the surface of the bench. “Yeah, I… Thank you Mr. Stark, really. I don’t know when or even  _ if _ I would do that but… It means a lot. Like, so much.”

He can feel Tony’s eyes on him as the words stumble messily from his mouth, and he’s only slightly surprised when he wraps a comforting arm around his shoulders. Peter leans slightly into the contact, relishing in the warmth that seeps through his shirt and further still into his skin. 

“It’s alright kid,” Tony says, voice becoming uncharacteristically soft the same way May’s would when saying  _ “I love you”  _ before he leaves for school or patrol every day. His heart practically soars in his chest, warmth blossoming from behind his ribs and spreading to the very tips of his fingers as he struggles to keep a beaming smile from surfacing involuntarily.

“What about this evening then?” Tony speaks again, and upon failing to elaborate, Peter merely turns to give him a confused look. “It’s still early, so how about we start on the whole living out your teen years to the fullest thing. What do you think? A midnight escapade perhaps?”

Peter takes a moment to process the offer before his eyes dart back down again in contemplation. Tony meanwhile waits patiently for his answer, rattling off sensible ideas to fill the silence, even if it isn’t exactly uncomfortable. Eventually he comes to a decision.

“Would it be alright if I stayed the night here? It’s just that I haven’t really had the opportunity to see a proper sunset or anything in a while since I’m only ever out as Spider-Man when it’s already dark and the skyscrapers are always in the way and—” he heaves in a breath and lets it out slowly.

Tony chuckles at this, the corners of his eyes wrinkling as he does. “Of course, Pete. I can let your aunt know that you won’t be coming home tonight. Besides, it’s the weekend, so you won’t be missing out on school at the very least. Friday?” 

“May Parker has been contacted, boss,” comes the reply. Sometimes Peter still isn’t used to the AI being as ever-present as it is. 

“Thanks, Fri. Now, I’m sure we can head up early and continue this session from where we left off tomorrow, hm? We’ve only got a few hours of day left, anyway.”

Tony guides him out of his chair before entering the elevator together, the whole way refusing to let go of his hold around the teen’s shoulders. Peter leans ever so slightly further into his mentor’s side, allowing the exhaustion that weighs heavy on his body to slip beyond his hold. The man once again disturbs the quiet by asking what he’ll want for dinner, to which he almost instantly replies with pizza, much to the other’s chagrin. ( _ “Don’t you ever get sick of eating pizza? I swear you eat it every time you’re here!” _ )

The two sit in the common room, discussing anything that comes to mind for hours upon end while a movie plays in the background until Friday announces that the food has arrived as scheduled. As they go to leave the kitchen, pizza boxes stacked in their arms, Peter manages to snatch an extra bag of chips from a cupboard before ducking into the elevator alongside Tony. The man merely exaggeratedly rolls his eyes before muttering about him eating him out of house and home under his breath, causing the boy to gently elbow him in the side with a laugh.

By the time they’ve made it through the rooftop access door, the sun is already well on its way towards the horizon. He hadn’t realised until now just how pleasant the view really is, never having stood on the roof of the facility until now. A stretch of trees that rarely goes interrupted lays on the other bank of the river that the compound is situated on, offering an array of greens and the occasional dash of orange or yellow, proof of the changing of seasons. It’s not extreme to say it’s anything short of beautiful, though he concludes that he’ll have to come back up here in the middle of autumn for the full spectacle.

The sight adds a skip to his step as Peter walks towards the edge and manages to sit himself down, his legs hanging over the edge as he places the food down beside him and attempts to get comfortable. Once Tony finally reaches him, the man sets his share of the meal down by Peter’s and hands the boy one of the blanket’s he’d snatched from the common room on their way out. He takes it gratefully, draping it around his shoulders as the man sits down and does the same, protecting themselves from the evening chill. 

They start up conversation again while they eat, though as the sun settles lower and lower in the sky with each passing minute, talk eventually tapers off in favour of them focusing on their food and watching the world around them. Between the two of them, the three boxes of pizza are emptied with haste, though Peter definitely has the more significant portion. Even still, once they're done, Peter turns to the Doritos bag he’d brought with them, opening it and settling it between them as the sky first begins to change from blue to yellow. Both of them dive into it as well, voicing the same disappointment and bitterness at the bag being barely half full right from the get-go.

They watch in silence as the sky paints itself before their eyes, shades shifting imperceptibly until they realise the soft pink has overtaken where there once was a shimmering gold. By the time the sun has cast the clouds alight along the horizon as a mixture of fiery red and orange, Peter has forgotten about the chips entirely, eyes glued to the array of colours that dance in slow-moving unison to a tune unknown to them. 

While it feels like the world slows down to appreciate the view with them, he realistically knows it could have only been a minute or two at most as the sun fully disappears beyond the trees and the darkness begins to overtake the stage instead. He has to blink rapidly and rub at his eyes to try and clear the spots of light that remain burned into his eyelids, but he thinks that it was worth it anyway. It’s then as he yawns and looks back out at the sky that something catches his attention. It elicits a surprised gasp from him, which he sees in his peripheral vision pull Tony’s notice. He doesn’t explain though, simply raises his eyes above them and stares at the twinkling lantern-like lights that have begun to fade into view with the sun’s absence.

He pushes the empty pizza boxes from behind him and out of reach before he drops the blanket from his shoulders and lets it fall across the concrete. Finally, he lays back in the space he has cleared for himself until he is staring straight upward with a clear view of what is to come. 

Tony watches him do this with a cocked brow, and when Peter looks over at him, he mirrors his expression before putting on a shit-eating smile and patting the concrete beside him. 

The man shakes his head, not dismissively, but instead with his own disbelieving smile.

“You’re insufferable.”

“Yes, that’s exactly why you keep inviting me back several times a week, it’s because I’m insufferable.”

“You’re proving my point.”

Peter doesn’t respond, instead patting the spot beside him again in his failure to cooperate, sporting his best impersonation of a puppy that has just had its favourite toy taken away. It proves effective when Tony sighs and scoots across the ledge until he’s slightly closer before throwing his own blanket back and laying down with a groan at his side. 

“Been a while since I last saw the stars like this,” Peter murmurs while he gets comfortable, bone-deep exhaustion clinging to every word.

Tony hums. “I guess the city isn't so great for stargazing.”

Peter hums back in favour of verbal response, falling silent and listening to the night come alive around them. 

He fails to notice Tony fiddling with something on his watch and how the light level sensors don't automatically flip on the floodlights throughout the facility grounds. Instead, he trains his eyes on the river of stars that slowly brighten as the dark blue of dusk turns black. Peter begins trying to map out the sky and find the constellations. His heart sinks slightly at realising he has long since forgotten them, the memories and knowledge slowly plucked away by years of disuse.

“Mr. Stark?”

Tony makes a questioning sound and he can see the man turn to him in his periphery. He doesn't answer for a moment, eyes searching hard out of hope to remember  _ something _ before he sighs through his nose.

“Do you know any of the constellations?”

“I can definitely pick out some of them. For instance, there's Draco…”

Peter listens attentively as Tony points out and names off several of the formations, mentally quizzing himself on their positions in the sky. It’s eerily similar to the nights he and Ben had spent out of the city, where his uncle would help Peter trace the lines connecting the stars and memorise their names. He doesn't want to forget them again.

Eventually, once they’ve managed to locate every constellation visible above them, the topic begins to bounce between anything that appears even slightly relevant. It doesn’t take long before Peter becomes too tired to offer his own input, and when his eyes are finally too heavy to hold open any longer, he allows them to fall closed. He tries to listen as his mentor rattles off the projects he plans to start in the coming weeks, and he does his best to hum in agreement when appropriate. His mind soon settles into a sleep-like state, and he doesn't even notice when the man stops talking and laughs quietly to himself. 

“Pete?” He hears quietly, and it takes a few seconds for his sleep-ridden brain to process what was said. He manages a groan in response.

“Keep my offer in mind, yeah? I'll do anything if it means you're better off for it.”

Hearing the seriousness laced through the words causes his heart to add an extra beat to its rhythm. He leaves a stretch of silence, mulling over his words as carefully as possible in his condition.

“I will… Thank you, Tony.” 

His eyes still closed, he doesn’t see it, but he hears the man move beside him. A hand pushes back some of the hair that had come to settle on his forehead, and a contented sigh slips out unbidden at the touch.

“As far as sunsets go, by the way, that was far from the best.” Tony falls silent a moment before deciding to tack on “Guess we’ll just have to do this until we get one of the really good ones.”

Peter smiles sleepily up at the sky, voice coming quiet and slurred as the fog of exhaustion drags him into a freefall. “I'd love that.”

**Author's Note:**

> Once again, this fic was inspired by ironarana's. Go check it out if you haven't already
> 
> After I finished writing this I realised there's a lot more I can do to branch off with this concept, and I'm considering whether or not I might write a follow-up that explores the idea of Peter taking up Tony's offer to cover his patrols. I'm not sure if that would be something anyone is interested in, but whether it happens would entirely depend on my own motivation anyway. It's definitely tempting though,,,,,
> 
> If you made it this far, feel free to come [chat with me on Tumblr!!](https://chiwithekiwi.tumblr.com/) I haven't been quite as active there but I'm trying my best


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